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Haddaway

from Haddaway by SuNray Jahchild

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From The Bing Selfish Radio Show First Series part 10B: Good Ole Amerikan Hospitality

The scenario: Two lazy, useless members of the Selfish Guard, Greg Canker and “Lucky” Geoff Barking, are sent on a mission to investigate a “minor incident” in Portland, Oregon. Stranded through no fault of their own (though so many other things are their own fault) in the middle of Amerika, waylaid by country types for trespassing, the last ditch attempt to escape grandpaw and Billie Jo and all is for Geoff to invoke the power of The Saddest Song In The World: “Haddaway”. Now listen on. Have your handkerchief in an accessible position.

lyrics

In the key of A:

Haddaway, haddaway
Ye cannie lass
I’m hopeless and jobless
And I cannae pay me Bingcome tax

Da deed doon the pit
Me brother doon the mine
Wor sister didn’t earn a ha’penny
For a bloater down by the Tyne

Wor nan she’s got the squitters
The whelkie’s daughter’s says the baby’s mine
Ma’s been sickenered for whoooring again
And we’z cannae pay the fine

Haddaway, haddaway
Ye cannie lass
Doon in Whitley bay
We die poor
But we live fast

Haddaway, haddaway
Ye cannie lass
Wor life is so ephemeral
When your cannie lassie’s gone away to a Selfish reorientation and revisualisation training camp

credits

from Haddaway, released December 31, 2023
Written by SuNray Jahchild
Voice: SuNray Jahchild
Music: Bing Selfish

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